Pop quiz:
You're woken around midnight by your 4-year-old child crying.
You go through. They tell you that they had a nightmare and don't need the toilet.
You give them a hug but they refuse to curl up and go instantly back to sleep like they usually do.
They tell you that their knee hurts because they bashed it "just now" (which you totally didn't see).
After a few minutes they fall asleep, but then wake up again 90 seconds later, crying.
And the same two minutes after that.
What do you need to do to put them back to sleep?
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( The answer )

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The countdown to bedtime starts at 20:00 with me asking if anyone is still hungry. And then hopefully by 20:30 they've finished having multiple cream-cheese wraps, ham sandwiches, and whatever else they need because dinner was almost two hours previous and so their stomachs are terribly terribly empty.

And then we brush teeth (we have an app that helps them focus on that, and they take turns choosing which Disney/Marvel/Star Wars character it will show). I love that it works in quadrants, so that they know where they should be brushing at any point, and everywhere gets some attention.

And then they argue over who Jane will put into their pyjamas first. And usually there are tears from whoever isn't first. Because being "first" is now a thing, and they will work themselves up into a state over the smallest thing that they weren't first at.

And then I read them a book (which they take turns choosing different nights). Sophia's current choice is Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Gideon likes Peppa Pig. They sit on my lap and fight over who gets to sit on my left leg. I have *no* idea why being on the left is so important, but about 6 months ago they started asking if they were walking on the left when we were out with them, and *that* turned into a battle over which of them would get to be on the left. And then it spread. Seems to have calmed down a bit recently though.

And then, when we've reached the end of a chapter/short book, Sophia climbs into the top bunk and falls asleep in about 3 minutes. Sometimes asking to hold my hand while she does. And then waking up when I try to pry my hand back out of her iron grip.

And Gideon climbs into his bottom bunk, with Jane lying next to him, and complains he's not tired for about five more minutes and then falls asleep as soon as he stops talking for more than ten seconds.

Once Gideon is asleep you can play a brass band in the bedroom and not wake him up. You have to be slightly sneaky if Sophia is awake though. If she realises that you're leaving the room before she's at least 160% asleep then she sits bolt upright and demands that you come back and hold her hand. On days when she's stressed this can happen multiple times. But thankfully that hasn't happened for a few weeks.

And then I go downstairs and stack the dishwasher. If that's all done by 9:30 then I might play fifteen minutes of a computer game (Thronefall is my recent city-builder/tower defense game which is great for being playable in small chunks). But mostly I just then climb into bed, read for fifteen minutes, and fall asleep myself.